and when i feel blue about my car getting stolen i just think to myself... at least i'm not this guy

I'm driving around in a Pontiac Grand Prix now. It's the most guido thing I've ever been a part of. I'm not a Pontiac fan and I've always had this joke that Pontiacs are for tacky girls from Florida who wear their clothes too tight. This might prove my theory. Although Alex has a good time driving it (maybe too good of a time) I would have to pass it up if it were offered to me again. Not that I'm saying I would rather have a Ford Escort or a Geo Metro, I'm just saying I'm not sure if wider really is better. I'm a little unnerved by the "WideTrack", which the display eagerly reminds me is the coolest feature of the automobile every time I put the key in. The WideTrack makes me feel like I might hit the car next to me, the WideTrack makes it nearly impossible to fit in a parking spot, the WideTrack disables me from picking up items dropped on the passengers side while driving. I was in the zone with the Saturn. With an hour commute (each way) everyday I've started a little game called "what can I do while I'm driving to distract me from the traffic so when it actually starts moving is when I get mad". I would do things like reprogram my radio stations, so they were in order, from talk to pop. Or see if I could actually use my lipliner effectively and look fabulous. One time I put 6 new numbers in my cell phone. I wasn't an unsafe driver, just managing my time. Now due to WideTrack the game is off. I can't do anything but look at the road and hope I don't hit the jersey barrier. God forbid I'm flanked by cars, that requires concentration I haven't used since the SATs. Greg and I carpooled today and I had the challenge of conversation while WideTracking. I did okay, but there were a few times I got the sweaty palm.
The automatic door locks and window might make up for it in the long run, and seeing that it is fully covered by our insurance I really shouldn't complain. and did I mention the bonus? Alex asked me if I wanted to check out the trunk, cause you gotta see how big it is... and he pops it open and there are all these bags. At first I thought they were surprises for me, but as it turns out it's just stuff left over from the last renter. Things like sneaker boots with 3 inch spiked heels, a curling iron and a bag full of underwear that smells like smoke. mmmmmm. Surprise! the Saturn was never this exciting.