thrombophilia

Or as I like to call it, unfortunate illness #731.

On the night of August 1 I landed myself a 9 day stay in the beautiful Alta Bates hospital ante-partum unit. Alex and I were having dinner with friends at Greg and Brad's apartment and right before I was ready to dig into my peanut butter cup ice cream I stood up to illustrate a point of the story I was telling and noticed that my left leg felt wrong. Wrong like "hmmmm, why can't I feel anything in my leg?" Wrong like dead weight. Wrong like this can't be good. So I excused myself and wandered off to the bathroom, assuming that the baby was to blame for all of this (I'm starting so early). I figured he must have been sitting on nerve or something and if I walked around he would move and my leg issue would be resolved. When I got to the bathroom I took a peek at my leg and it was then I noticed it was swollen and a tad on the bluish side. Trying my best not to panic I washed my face, shook my leg a little and went back to the dining room. I ate one spoonful of ice cream, trying to ignore my leg, but I couldn't, so I quietly alerted Alex to the fact that I thought we should leave because something dreadful was happening to me. He suggested we move into the living room and I put my leg up, but by the time I reached the living room I knew that I needed do more with the leg than just put it up, purple toes are never a good sign. Ice cream abandonment is not a common trait for me, so everyone took me quite seriously when I said we had to leave. Alex and I rushed home and got on the phone with the OB on call and he gave me two choices: 1. Put my leg up and wait for it go away or 2. Go to the ER. I chose the latter. I figured I would be heading the hospital that night anyways, might as well be sooner than later.

So off to the ER we went and finally by 3:30am I was suited up with a nice open backed hospital johnnie and a steady IV of heparin. No one knew what was wrong with me quite yet, but after a slew of tests we found out the baby was doing great and I most likely had a blood clot in my leg, but more tests were waiting for me at 9am.

After meeting my daytime nurses and picking through my breakfast of French toast and fruit I was wheeled down on a gurney to the vascular lab where an ultrasound of my leg revealed a blood clot that ran from my groin to the back of my knee. I was officially diagnosed with DVT, deep vein thrombosis. Instead of being terrified I was relieved that I finally had an answer to why my leg was ailing and that it wouldn't hurt the baby. I was thrilled that this all happened before Saturday, because otherwise it could have all happened on a 6 hour flight to Boston, perhaps resulting in death. I was elated that this clot was discovered before pieces of it broke off and landed in my lungs. So sad to be bedridden, yet so happy to know why. I was handed a bunch of literature on how to deal with my new condition and every single one pictured fellow DVT suffers... all over 60.

It was a tough 9 days in the hospital. For the first 3 days I wasn't allowed to even get up and use the bathroom. I can't think of too many things that are more humiliating than using a bedpan, other than having your own urine spill from a bedpan forcing the nurses to give you a sponge bath and change your clothes and sheets while you just lie there. That's no fun. No fun at all. Having blood drawn every 5 hours also is no party, it left my arms looking like this. I could go on and on and I'm sure as the memories come flooding back to me I'll post more about my hospital hijinx, but I'd rather not re-visit those days right now. The rest of the month has been a steady diet of modified bed rest, working from home and little walking. I might lose my mind.

To sum it all up, the baby is okay, I'm okay and the clot is gone, thanks to the two daily injections of Lovenox I get to shove in my gut. This week I finally got permission to leave my home and drive a car, all by myself! So even though I have to take it easy I'm just about ready to return to my (somewhat) normal life. And wait for the next unfortunate illness to surprise me and Alex.

just wondering

Does this baby make me look fat?

kitten teeth

this is why Irene should never be unattended around a pair of flip-flops (or anything, for that matter).

tiny update

My sister and her family moved out here this weekend and I couldn't be happier. Even though my nephew stopped eating his yogurt mid-spoonful to inform me that I am an old woman I'm so very glad they're all here.

Irene and Ollie are getting along famously, they even share food and toys. I thought she was over her biting phase until this morning. As she rubbed her head on my leg I told her how sweet she was and then she unhinged that little jaw of hers and gave my heel a run for it's money. She sure showed me where flattery will get me.

Alex's radioactive tests came back clean, so we still have no idea what caused him to lose 3 pints of blood. What we do know is that he gets to swallow a mini camera pill thingy to take some pictures of his guts. We can't wait, it's like the ultimate gadget. I hope they print out some pictures for us, then we can hang them up right next to all the MRI pictures of my brain and sonogram print outs of the baby. We'll have a whole wall of untraditional family photos, it will be fabulous.

In pregnancy news, I bid a fond farewell to my ankles this week and finally ripped the seam on one of my cheap, large t-shirts from Target. My attempts to make it to the end of October with only 5 pieces of real maternity clothing have officially been thwarted. I give in and I'll spend this weekend buying some things I can only wear until November. I'll be on the look out for this, this and this, because that's what pregnant women like, right?

meet Irene

For some odd reason I started to guilty about how I'll ignore my cat after the baby is born. While in this guilty haze I decided that Ollie needed a playmate so I looked at cats on the Hopalong website and found the cutest little kitty, Irene, who seemed like a good match for Ollie. I sent in my application and got a call back that there was already an adoption pending for Irene. I decided that this was a sign and it was best that I just stick with one cat. About a week later I got a call from Alex telling me he just got off the phone with someone from Hopalong and Irene was available again. How could I say no to these eyes?She's still a little bite-y, but I'll give her a little leeway because she so darn cute.

my husband - the radioactive man

A few weeks ago I had to go to Boston for work. This was exciting for me because work was paying me go on a shoot for a story on one of my favorite games AND paying for me to have a little visit with my family as well as Lisa, Ben and their new baby. The night before I left things got ugly because Alex got sick, so sick that I was going to cancel the trip. Somehow, by the time morning rolled around Alex managed to pull everything together and give me a ride to the airport at 6:15 a.m., so I figured how sick could he be? Well, it turned out he was pretty sick; by the time I got off the plane I had 4 messages on my cell phone, all from Alex. In the first one he told me that they fit him in for a doctor's appointment at 10. Then he was at the doctor's and waiting to see what they had to say. The next one was from the emergency room, an ambulance had brought him there. The last message was a very sad sounding Alex telling me he was admitted to the hospital and needed to get some tests done, including a colonoscopy. I listened to all 4 of these with tears welling up in my eyes while we taxied to the gate in Boston. I felt so guilty, I wished I had never left. I stayed in the airport for about an hour making frantic phone calls and finally got in touch with Alex after talking to about 7 very nice people at the hospital. Alex and I decided that it was best for me to stay in Boston that night since I had just spent about 6 hours on a plane and it probably wasn't a good idea to cram myself into another airline seat for at least 24 hours, especially because there was nothing I could do if I went back home except sit in the hospital and worry. Our good friend Wil went to visit Alex at the hospital and called me to give me regular updates, so some of my guilt was lifted there. I was scheduled to stay in Boston for 4 days, but instead I went to visit Lisa, Ben and the new bambino that night, went to the shoot the next day and then flew out of Boston exactly 25 hours from when I arrived. When I got back to Oakland Wil greeted me with a delicious turkey burger and a ride to the hospital.

Visiting someone in the hospital at 10:30 at night isn't the easiest task but I finally got clearance. I then proceeded to get lost for about a half hour before I actually got to where I was going. I don't know what was more sad; seeing Alex with a saggy gown on all sprawled out in a hospital bed or the fact that he had to share this fairly small room with 3 other guys. He did have his own television to occupy his time, but if he wanted to watch it he had to keep his privacy curtain open (for me this would have been a dilemma because the fellow directly across from Alex had his curtain open almost all the time). The other dudes in the room seemed to be in much worse shape than Alex, there was a lot of moaning and grunting going on. Alex wasn't too bothered by all this, but he was complaining about how hungry he was and how he felt fine and just wanted to go home and to work. His colonoscopy came out fine and so did all the blood work, so whatever had been going on with him (which stopped about 24 hours after it started) was still a mystery. He was discharged the next day around noon and actually went to work the day after that. Obviously he's much more of a go-getter than I'll ever be.

Since they didn't come up with any answers at the hospital as to what might be going on with Alex's insides, he got scheduled for more appointments and more tests. He had one done today... a Meckel scan. This is to test for a little pocket or pouch in the small intestine by injecting some radioactive dye into the patient and then looking at the dye with some big ol' imaging equipment. At first they told me I could stay in the room with Alex during the test, since it takes about an hour for the dye to flow where they need to look at it, but then I told them I was pregnant and the plans changed a little. The exchange went something like this:

Should I not be in here because I'm pregnant?

Hmmm, well, yeah, I guess you should wait out there. Better safe than sorry. The equipment doesn't emit anything radioactive, but your husband will.

So he'll be radioactive today?

Sure, but only for about 12 hours.

I asked Alex if he wanted a super-baby, because if he did I could stay in the room. I mean, think about it, I could give birth to the next Spiderman or something. How rad would that be? I ended up going to the waiting room for the next hour, but they left the door open to the room, so I could see Alex napping for just about the whole hour.

Now we have to wait a week to find out if anything showed up in the scan (and about 4 months to find out if our baby will be a super hero). If the Meckel scan turns up clean there's a possibility that Alex will get to swallow a camera that will take pictures as it travels through him. We're keeping our fingers crossed for this one, there's nothing quite like a Fantastic Voyage.

halfway there

I decided not to write about this before because I've been tired and going through some big ups and downs, but there's no hiding it anymore, I'm pregnant. 20 weeks to be exact, the baby is due on Halloween.

Luckily I decided to spare the internets reports of my countless nights of heartburn and burping (sometimes for 6 continuous hours), my many fruitless shopping trips for new bras and how I used rubber bands to keep wearing my regular jeans as long as possible. Being pregnant hasn't been so bad so far, it's taken more of a mental toll than a physical one.

The hardest part of the last 20 weeks was all the testing they did and waiting for results. Originally I figured I would opt out of most of the tests, but when I went in for my first OBGYN visit I was handed this giant folder of papers which I like to call the "so you're 35 or older, that means your baby is most likely a disaster" packet. After reading all the info and sweating a lot, Alex and I decided that we would move forward with the blood test and the nuchal translucency screening, but we would skip the amnio because of the risk involved. The nuchal fold screening was normal, but the blood test came back showing an elevated risk of the baby having Down syndrome. We were still feeling fairly hopeful despite the elevated risk, so we continued to decline the amnio, but decided to go for a level II ultrasound instead. It was great to see the baby that day; we found out that he's a boy and he did some nice posing for us. Although it was exciting to see the baby for 20+ minutes it was also a very nerve-wracking process, because the test is done to look for soft markers for Down syndrome. Obviously Alex and I had no idea what we were looking for, or sometimes looking at, so anytime there was a long pause or it seemed like the woman operating the equipment was measuring something too much we got very tense. By the end everything seemed status quo to us, but the doctor came to check all the pictures and informed us that the baby is missing a bone in his right pinky, which is a soft marker for Down syndrome. We left the doctor's office feeling okay, but the more we thought about it and the more research we did on the internet (perhaps the worst thing we could have possibly done) Alex and I decided that we needed to know if the baby had Down syndrome or not. I couldn't stand not knowing until the end of October, I was worried sick. We finally gave in by the end of the day and decided to get the amnio done. We had to wait a week to get the test done, and then wait another 10 days for the results. The amnio itself wasn't the worst part, it was the waiting that almost killed me. I can't even explain the kind of panic, worry and fretting I did during those 10 days. I wondered if I had made the wrong decision to even know, because if the news wasn't what I wanted to hear what would I do? How would I prepare for that? I made up a million different scenarios over those 10 days. I went for lots of walks and I had tons of support from Alex and my friends. We finally got the results back, while I was at work I got a message on my cell phone from a genetic counselor telling me she had good news and I should call her back. The baby does not have Down syndrome or any neural tube defect. Just a missing pinky bone. I've never felt so relieved.
Here's our boy giving a shout out. Now if you'll excuse me I have some chips to eat while I tune into a very special Dateline. Sure Britney is on, but more importantly it appears that Matt Lauer is all casual-like; he's not wearing a tie, but I do believe he's wearing jeans, loafers and NO socks. Now that's good watchin'.

oh, hi.

Looks I've decided not to post things here anymore. Hmmm, I should start again. But not today... it's a long story and I might write about it someday.

Instead I'll post some pictures. Here's what I submitted for Photo Friday this week, the theme is Home.

see you later, New York

Here I am at the same table in JFK, waiting to depart. I have about an hour until I can get on my flight, but don't expect a lengthy post, because I want to make sure I have enough time to get chewed out by one of the employees here at Famiglia Pizza.

Our trip was delightful, the room was spacious and the weather was great. We saw Spamalot on Wednesday, then we miraculously won the lottery for 25 dollar (front row - not as fun as you think it is) tickets for Wicked on Thursday and Friday we saw Sweeney Todd. We also went to the Empire State Building, Central Park, walked up and down 5th Avenue a million times and ate some delicious and overpriced food.

Here are a few of the pictures... please know that I wasn't at my photo best, so they're pretty lame and touristy.

greetings from New York

I'm sitting in JFK enjoying some free wireless action (courtesy of JetBlue) while I wait for my mom's flight to arrive from Boston. My mom and I will be here until Saturday, seeing shows, walking around and whatever else mothers and daughters do.

Not too much to report so far, because obviously I haven't left the airport yet, but I will tell you that I ordered my slice of pepperoni pizza from the wrong person at the Famiglia Pizzeria and got a stern talking to from the woman at the register. Damn, I'll get eaten alive out here. Good thing I live in the land of hippies where I can order pizza from any old slob without pissing someone off.

April showers

If I had posted earlier this month I would have complained about the rain. But since it was sunny today I have nothing but nice things to say about the weather. In fact, I'll even post this picture I took from my balcony yesterday.

hitting an all time low

I'm in a slump. It happens. I head down this slippery slope and the next thing I know I'm on the couch with one hand shoved into a box of Wheat Thins and the other hand tightly wrapped around the remote control. If you were to peek in my window you would find me watching such TiVo delights as the Amazing Race, Survivor, Lost and the Office. I've been feeling a small void because Project Runway is over, and sure, I'm watching Top Chef, but it's just not the same... although I do love to see people get stressed out while wielding sharp knives. In times of desperation I get so low I'll even watch The Apprentice and America's Next Top Model, both of which are not so shabby with a little help from the fast forward button. You think all of this crappy television would be enough for me, but due to recent bouts of insomnia I now run out of pre-recorded programs quickly and instead of finding something else to do I resign myself with reckless abandon to the remote.

The reckless abandon only results in horror: aimless channel flipping leads to disasters such as Deal or No Deal, monstrosities like Who's Wedding Is It Anyway? or even a shameful hour of American Idol. It's ugly. Very ugly.

I'm not sure if there's a purpose behind this post, I suppose it's really just a confession. And now you are free to judge me and my filthy TV habits. You can tell me to pick up a book and read something, like a civilized person would do, perhaps you will feel the urge to suggest a hobby or some random activity to keep me interactive with other human beings.

Or maybe I should just start writing rants about the garbage I've been watching. Then I would be committed to something, because that would set me on the fast track to overweight-middle-aged-crazy-cat-lady-who-I'm-afraid-to-talk-to status.

Mr. Speedy Bottom's Shoebox Adventures

Today my turtle ate some lettuce and yawned a little. I think tomorrow I might let him scoot around in the bathtub for an hour while I braid my hair.

what's that you say?

I'm supposed to write stuff here? Oh, right, this is where I would insert little stories and post funny lyrics from time to time.

I would love to update but the lazy me just reminded the bloggy me that after I finish up here at work I still have an episode of Lost, 2 episodes of Top Model and some other crappy shows to catch up on. Not to mention the amount of snacking I have to do.

favorite lyrics of the day (Valentine's edition)

I heard this ditty on the way to work this morning and I thought I would share it with everyone.... to help get you in the romantic mood.

Magic, by Charlie Wilson

Good evening, baby and welcome to the Charlie show
Tonight I'm going to be showing you things that you've never seen before
so just sit back and relax
because tonight I'm going to be doing some things
that no man has ever done to you, baby
Aiiight, listen

Abrakadabra form of a bedroom
Now add a little candle light and the scent of your sweet perfume, girl
Hocus pocus (poof) now you in that cute little dress that I like
Now don't lose focus on what I'm about to show you tonight

Chorus:
I can do magic
One snap of your finger girl,
I'll perform a trick on you
Anything you want me to do
Cuz I could do magic
Girl all you gotta do is dim the lights
and I'll show you a trick or two
awwww baby because I could do magic, I could do magic

Now I ain't no psychic but I can see what you need, girl
And you don't have to write it
cuz looking at your body I could read, girl
you giving me the eye and it's making me want you bad, girl.
Turn around.
Now can you guess what's in my pants?

Chorus

I'll make our friends disappear
Then out of nowhere, a hotel room will appear
Then suddenly, next thing you know it's you and me
(I'll touch you babe)
Girl, know I lose, just please believe
Bear witness to what I'm about to do
turn the lights off and make all your wishes come true
Wave my hand, wink my eye, there goes your clothes
there's something I want you to know.

Chorus

Call me Houdini or David Copperfield
I am your genie, baby, this love for you is real.
And girl what we have is magic and I vow to never let it go
So abrakadabra and hocus pocus
Now we are married forever more

I'll let you guess which verse is my favorite.

I also will add these flowers, to be extra classy.Happy Valentine's Day.

get arrested

please don't forget to watch all 4, that's right, FOUR, episodes of Arrested Development tonight. I can assure you that they will all kick ass.

recovering

I think I'm almost done with this icky flu thing. Besides coughing up the occasional lung chunk or getting a head rush from standing up too fast, I'm feeling pretty good. I will now share with you a photo of the bounty that Alex left for me on Friday before he left for work: My favorite part was the pudding, so soothing and delicious for swollen tonsils. My least favorite part was the Robitussin. I avoided it until Alex forced me to take some on Friday night. And when I say some I mean too much, I'm pretty sure he made me O.D.. About an hour ingesting the Robo I was convinced there were critters crawling up and down my arms. Alex came into the bedroom to find me slapping myself and mumbling about bugs. The next day he informed me that over the course of the evening my hallucinations had graduated to some form of Tourette syndrome - I would sleep for about 20 minutes and then wake up and repeatedly and violently shout "FUCK! It wasn't me!" or "SHIT! I didn't do it!" Apparently this cycle continued for a few hours, luckily I don't remember any of it.

boregon

I'm sure Oregon is a lovely state, but I only witnessed the outdoor part at night, so I think I missed out on a lot. I was there last Sunday - Tuesday for work and I only saw the insides of a few buildings, including hotels. From one of the offices we visited I got a glimpse of the mountains, and on our three hour drive from Bend to Eugene I could make out a lot of snow piled up on the sides of the pass. I think there was a covered bridge somewhere along the way, but it was hard to see stuff in the dark.

The worst part of the trip (besides catching the flu from Hell) was the flight from SFO to Redmond. I've never been on a prop plane before and much to my delight I was able to sit in the seat where I had a perfect view of the propeller. I actually wasn't too bothered by the whole thing until we were coming for the landing and we hit 60mph cross winds. I tried to play it cool and act like I was okay by continuing to knit, but in reality my palms were sweaty and the blanket I was making suffered deeply due my angst.

I wouldn't mind going back there, because that mountain pass would have been a lot more fun to drive through during the day... with friends.

I'm hot blooded

check it and see, I've got a fever of a hundred and three.

No, seriously, I do. I'm currently getting my ass kicked by the flu. You know the one, the one I didn't get a shot for this year. I can't explain how much I hate this, not only is it painful, but it's boring. I've only been sitting around the house for about 24 hours and I feel like I'm going crazy. I would get out and take a walk but there are a few factors working against me: 1. the weather really sucks 2. I have a hard time walking when I'm shivering out of control and 3. did I mention that I'm miserable and sick?

yeah, it's been a week

and I have some things I want to write about, but I've been busy as well as lazy. I know those things don't go together, but trust me, it's happening.

Here's this week's entry for Photo Friday, the challenge is vanity.
If you think this beauty is bewitching from a distance, take a closer look at this dazzling make-up job. Oh, if only we could read the name tag.